Wherever You Are My Love Will Find You

January 9th, 2012

By Michael Gouterman, HCC Intern

While spending time with my dear ones over the holidays, I came across a lovely book by Nancy Tillman called Wherever You Are My Love Will Find You. It’s a wonderful little meditation on the greatest gift we wish to give our children – our unyielding love.

Sadly, we all know that there are members of our families, those who have experienced trauma in their early childhood, who have the greatest difficulty hearing our message of love, affection, and admiration. They just cannot believe it, they fight receiving it and resist it at every turn, despite our most persistent efforts to express our deep love.  That’s why I love this book: because we can read it over and over and over again, until maybe, just maybe, one little, tiny shred of our love of them will sink in.

One particular passage from the book strikes me about the message of love we wish to give to our children, “…if someday you’re lonely, or someday you’re sad, or you strike out at baseball, or think you’ve been bad… just lift up your face, feel the wind in your hair. That’s me, my sweet baby, my love is right there.” I know we mean it, and we all pray they’ll learn to hear and receive it.

That’s why at the Parenting in SPACE conference 2012 we will be working hard to help parents learn every method of communication possible to send the message of love so well articulated in the book.  To learn and practice the art of therapeutic parenting at Parenting in SPACE, we will learn how to establish and create Safety, Support, Supervision, Structure, Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy as our guiding light with our hurt children. With this foundation we can create an environment in our families that allows us to continuously communicate our deep message of love that – with time and an abundance of patience – may allow our children to blossom as loving and loved humans.

And what better way could you start Parenting in SPACE then by enjoying a relaxed and informal discussion with Christine Moers, therapeutic parent extraordinaire and author of the blog WelcomeToMyBrain.net? Be part of a small and very personal group as part of the Relax and Connect pre-conference, where you can ask any and every question you may have for Christine, mother of five children via both adoption and birth. Pick her brain for everything you can because it is a glorious treasure chest of experience and trial and error!